They share with us. Well, I have received a full page of questions.
First of all, I would like to say that nobody can answer all the questions. Even if people try to answer questions, their answers are still quite limited. The only One who is able to answer all questions, I guess you all know, is the Lord Himself.
That is the reason why, in the new covenant, our Lord Jesus covenanted with us. There is one article: if you read Hebrews 8:11, He will tell you, “You do not need anyone to say to you, ‘Know the Lord,’ because every one of you knows Him in himself, from the littlest one to the greatest one.”
Now that is in the new covenant, and today we are people of the new covenant. In the old days, because they did not have the Holy Spirit, how did they know the Lord? They knew the Lord by people telling them, “Know the Lord.” People who were knowledgeable in the Scriptures and had understanding would tell others, “Know the Lord.”
But such knowing is objective knowledge. That is to say, you gather knowledge from outside. Today we are living in the new covenant, and the Lord tells us that we do not need anyone to tell us, “Know the Lord.” Why? Because He says, “Everyone shall know Him in himself.”
The second “know” is different from the first, because this knowing is subjective knowledge. In other words, it is experiential knowledge. Within yourself, you will know the Lord because the Holy Spirit dwells in you, and He will show you the Lord.
Even from the littlest ones—that is to say, if you are newly saved—you have the Holy Spirit in you. So you have the opportunity of knowing the Lord in yourself, experientially: an inward knowledge. If you are the greatest one, it is the same thing; but, of course, you know Him with more experience, and know Him more.
So this is the new covenant. First of all, I hope we as believers will exercise our spirit and try to know the Lord inwardly. If we open our hearts to the Lord, if we pray to Him, if we wait upon Him, He will show us in our spirit what is the will of God. That is the real knowing of the Lord.
Now, if that is the case, we often say that we will throw all the teachers out of the window, because we have no need of them. So why does God raise up teachers, prophets, and evangelists? It is not because He wants us to be taught outwardly.
Your life is so precious to the Lord. He will not commit your life to anyone. He Himself will take care of your life, and He takes care of your life by the Holy Spirit, who dwells in you.
But because we are human beings, we have our weaknesses. Probably we misunderstand what the Holy Spirit is saying to us. So that is why God raises up teachers, prophets, evangelists, and such people—not to direct our lives, but to confirm or correct how we feel. These are their works.
In other words, I may be able to help you a little bit as to your questions, but the real answer—the Lord has to give you the real answer.
As I look through all these questions, I feel they are good questions. In my own little experience, I would like to share with you how I feel about these things. You can leave it as it is, because that is all I know. I hope I will share something according to the Word of God, and it may be a help to you. I do not think it will solve your problems, but it may be a help. That is all I can do.
You have two different kinds of questions. One kind has nothing to do with what you are reading now, The Secret of Christian Living. The other questions have something to do with The Secret of Christian Living. Now I will read the first one.
The Lord has done some special work among the Moravians, the Brethren, and in China in the 1920s and 1930s, and at other times. How can the Lord do a similar work in our midst today? What was unique about these brothers that allowed the Lord to work? Was it that they prayed more, laid down their lives more, or was it that the Lord sovereignly made special provision so they could follow His truth? Can you share your experience of the revival in China with us, so we can learn from history?
I feel the spirit behind such a question is commendable. There is a prayer that I do feel should be our prayer constantly, and it is the prayer of Habakkuk. You remember Habakkuk in the Old Testament, in Habakkuk 3:2. He prayed, “Revive Thy work, O Lord, in the midst of the years.”
So in whatever days we are living, deep down within us there should be a prayer to the Lord: “Revive Thy work.” Reviving Thy work is not what we usually think of as revival.
I believe you have heard of revival campaigns, revival conferences, and revival meetings. From time to time, you have a special revival meeting and try to stir up God’s people. But oftentimes such revivals come and go. They are more an uplifting of our emotions than a real solving of the problem.
No. “Revive Thy work” is in connection with God’s purpose. We realize that God is working out His purpose. You remember our Lord Jesus said, “My Father worketh even until now, and I work.” There is a work that God is doing, and that is the work of Christ. It is the work committed to us so that God can work out His purpose.
So in whatever age we may be living, it should be the prayer of God’s people. In other words, we are concerned not just for our own interests; we are concerned for the interests of God. So I say the spirit of such a question is commendable. We should have such a spirit.
Even though I have read about the Moravian movement and about the Brethren movement, and I suppose you have read or heard about such history, I was involved in that reviving work of God in China. Therefore, I look more intimately into what God has done in China.
Actually, you can see that it was the result of the prevailing prayer of two sisters: Miss Margaret E. Barber and her niece.
Miss Margaret E. Barber came to Fuzhou, China, as a missionary from the Anglican Church. She was sent to Fuzhou to teach in a school. She knew the Lord and loved the Lord. While she was teaching in that school, she led a number of students to the Lord.
Because of that, she aroused the jealousy of her fellow teachers. They accused her of some things, and the committee, without telling her what she was accused of, told her that she should return to England.
When she asked for the reason and who was accusing her, they refused to tell her. Of course, she was greatly distressed. She prayed to the Lord. She felt it was an injustice. At least she should know who was accusing her or what she was accused of, but they refused to tell her.
While she was praying, the Lord called her. He said, “I am the Head. You are a member of the Body of Christ, and the one who accuses you is also a member of the Body of Christ. Remember, whichever member suffers, I suffer. So why do you not just be quiet?”
And she submitted. So she returned to England. Eventually, she was justified.
After she returned to England, she met with an independent group led by D. M. Panton. I suppose some of you have read the writings of D. M. Panton. He was one greatly used by the Lord, especially in prophecy.
While she was there, she felt the Lord wanted her to come back to China. But there was no mission behind her, so she wondered whether she should come back to China. Finally, she was told, “If the Lord sends you there, there you go.”
So she returned. Because the other missionaries ostracized her, she went to a village outside of Fuzhou. She came with her niece. The two of them stayed in the village and tried to evangelize the village people.
As they were doing that, she felt in her heart that if God should do something in China, there should be some intellectual people caught by God, and that would influence China. So they began to pray that the Lord would raise up some educated people to start the work of God in China.
It was mainly through their prayer that the students in Trinity College began to receive help from her. Brother Watchman Nee was the one most helped, because she was very disciplinary. When people went to her, they were dealt with, and people could not bear it.
Thank God for our brother, that he was able to be under such discipline for a long time. He told us himself how he sometimes suffered from his fellow workers, and he felt he was right. So he went to see Miss Barber, hoping that she would stand with him.
Miss Barber always told him, “Your brother is older than you are. Obey the older one.” He said he was so disappointed. But by the grace of God, he learned the lesson.
When you trace back what God did in China in the 1920s, the basic reason for that revival was the prevailing prayer of Miss Barber and her niece.
In the early 1920s, God began to save a group of students in Trinity College. All the best students and the worst students of every class got saved.
Then, in 1922, they tried to hold a public meeting for the first time. They invited a sister from Nanjing to come to their revival meeting. That sister was Miss Ruth Lee, who was at that time the editor of a famous Christian magazine.
Her story was a story in itself. She was a most educated woman, but she was an atheist and against Christianity. The Lord wonderfully saved her. So they invited her to come and lead the revival meeting.
As a matter of fact, she came only for three days, and then she had to leave. But the work of God had begun, so the students just continued on. That is how it first began in Fuzhou.
During that time, their main burden was evangelism. They would go out into the streets and preach. During vacation, they would go to other cities to preach the gospel. It was mainly an evangelical approach.
But while they were meeting together, the Lord began to open the eyes of our brother Watchman Nee. As he studied the Bible, he began to feel that God had something more than just evangelism. God wanted people to be gathered together and built up together as His church, as His wife.
So he tried to share this with his fellow workers, but they did not have that vision. Finally, he had to leave.
When you trace the history, actually the work began in Shanghai because of the war situation. Sister Ruth Lee, Sister Peace Wang, and others all moved to Shanghai. Brother Nee also came to Shanghai.
They first met together in Sister Peace Wang’s house. Gradually, in 1923, they rented a place on Hardoon Road in Shanghai and started a meeting there.
Thank God, I came to know the Lord in the 1930s. I was a senior in high school, and we organized Christian meetings every Friday after school. We used the Sunday-school building of the Methodist Church to have our so-called message meetings.
We tried to invite all the famous preachers in Shanghai to come and preach to us. Every Friday we changed the preacher, until after a while we had exhausted all the famous preachers.
I still remember that four of us were responsible—two teachers and two students. We talked about whom we should invite next. One teacher said, “I heard of a Watchman Nee. I will try to find him and ask him to come and preach to us.”
So he did. Our school was in the opposite part of Shanghai from where Brother Nee met, and it was a Tuesday. The teacher went to join their Bible study. At that time, every Tuesday they had Bible study.
During the Bible study, they studied what you would now call “questions and answers”—all the questions about the gospel. Every Tuesday someone raised a question about the gospel, they had fellowship on it, and Brother Nee also spoke on it.
After that meeting, the teacher asked Brother Nee to come and preach to us, and he did. I still remember one Friday afternoon after school when I went to that Methodist Church Sunday-school building and was introduced to Brother Watchman Nee. He was twelve years older than I, and he came with another brother.
Of course, he gave us a gospel message. I still remember what he spoke on: “God Is Willing.” It was published later. We were touched, but thank God, I was already saved.
Since that time, I went back to hear him at least once. I was deeply impressed. At the time, they met on Sunday afternoon at two o’clock. Because of the distance, we did not know how much time it would take, so another teacher and I went early and arrived at one o’clock.
We went into that meeting place. It was in a house. There were chairs inside, and in the courtyard there were long benches in the open air. Nobody was there, so we were the only two in that room.
As young people, we began to talk and laugh and make lots of noise. Suddenly, the back door opened, and a brother came in and said, “Please be quiet, because Mr. Nee is resting upstairs.” My, we were so frightened.
By two o’clock, the place was filled. Nobody talked. Whenever people came in, they sat down either reading the Bible or praying quietly. That atmosphere touched me very deeply.
At two o’clock Brother Nee came down and preached for two hours. No movement, no outside activity. The atmosphere really touched you very deeply. I could never forget it.
But, of course, I was too hot. I was on fire at that time. I was trying even to serve the Lord in my own way, so I was not ready to hear more.
Thank God, afterwards the Lord took me away from that kind of atmosphere and put me in a spiritual freezer. I was all alone in the school dormitory. It was during that time that the Lord began to open my heart and show me His way.
During those early days, we do find that the Lord began to use Brother Nee. In the 1930s, all along the coast of China, there were meetings everywhere.
Some meetings began without our knowledge, especially the meeting in Manchuria. The Lord gave those brothers the same vision. It was afterwards that we contacted each other.
When the war broke out with the Japanese, people began to migrate to interior China. Many brothers and sisters went into interior China, and we also followed into interior China. That is how the work began to extend.
After the war was over, you found that God’s work had spread all over China. That is the way God works.
You cannot repeat God’s work, but you can see that there are some principles behind it.
Number one: God is sovereign. It is not because we want a revival that we can make a revival. You cannot do that. God has His own timing.
From time to time in history, you find that when God moves, there will be a revival, a recovery, something that will affect even the whole world. Every time is different, but the principle is the same.
When God begins to move, He usually touches one or a few people and gives them the burden to pray—to travail in prayer.
You can always trace back any of the companies today. It begins very small—maybe one person, maybe a few people. The Lord begins to reveal Himself to them, gives them some understanding of what He desires, and they begin to pray and prevail.
Gradually, you find that the Lord begins to raise up something toward the recovery of His work. That principle is always there.
I feel that every age seems to show God moving differently. We are now living at the end of the age. Will God, before the coming of the Lord, give us another movement as we find in the past? That is a question I do not know how to answer.
Whether God will still do such a visible work before the return of our Lord, some people think there will be; other people think probably there will not be. So I do not know whether visibly we will have another such movement that will affect the whole world, or whether God will rather do it more secretly.
In other words, God will do something to prepare the Bride of Christ. He cannot return if His Bride is not ready. As you look at the time we are living in, we feel He is very close.
Whether there will be such an outward, visible movement again in church history, I do not know. But one thing I do know: there will be such a move in secret.
In the last days, God will move around the world to capture the hearts of people all over the world in a minority situation—not the whole church being revived, but overcomers, those faithful to the Lord. They will be as the man-child being born. When that happens, the coming of the Lord will come.
People often ask me, looking at the church situation today, “Can you expect a glorious church, without spot or any such thing, to be the Bride of the Lamb?” It does not look that way.
If you want the whole church to be revived worldwide in the way that has happened in the past, it seems very impossible. But how would God accomplish His purpose? He will—but how?
That is my feeling. With the eyes of faith, you can see that God has His hidden ways all over this world. I have met people in unexpected places where God made a real move, but it was unknown to the world.
So, brothers and sisters, I do feel that it is our burden and responsibility. We should pray that the Lord will revive His work in our days. It may not come as we expect, but it will come.
If, by the grace of God, we are among the remnant, thank God for His mercy. That is the way I feel about the first question.
Now the second question is: “Why is it so hard to love the Lord? What is your secret to keep your first love so fresh until now?” Now, you do not know me.
I do confess that today it is very difficult to love the Lord, because we are living in the end days. Lawlessness prevails. As our Lord Jesus said in Matthew 24, because lawlessness prevails, our love grows cold.
Temptations from the world and the time in which we live all make it very difficult for us to love the Lord. We can very easily lose our first love. That is very true.
But the Lord says, “He that endureth to the end, the same shall be saved.” So this is a critical time for us. It is not easy to maintain our first love for Him.
The demands of this age, the temptations that surround us, and the lawlessness that prevails over this world make it very easy for us to lose our first love. Then what can we do? How can we maintain our first love?
I remember the words of the Apostle Paul in 2 Timothy 1. He says:
I know whom I have believed,
and I am persuaded that He is able to guard that which I have committed unto Him against that day.
In other words, the preservation of the saints does not lie in ourselves. The preservation of the saints depends upon the Lord. He is able to keep us; we are not able.
No matter how you try or put forth your best efforts, the world is too strong for you. Self is too strong. You cannot overcome. With man it is impossible; with God all things are possible.
So, number one, thank God, we know whom we have believed. Number two, do we commit ourselves to the Lord as a deposit for Him to keep? If we try to keep ourselves, we will lose ourselves.
But if we really hand ourselves to the Lord, you will find that He is able to keep us until that day. We may fall, but even if we fall seven times, we will still rise again. That is His grace.
So, brothers and sisters, all I can say is that the Lord Jesus Christ is our only guarantee. You commit yourself to Him, and He will see to it that you will not lose your first love. That is all I can say.
Now these are general questions. We come to the questions after reading The Secret of Christian Living. I find The Secret of Christian Living very helpful.
You know, The Normal Christian Life really affected God’s people in this world greatly. When I came to this country in 1952, that was the book that really stirred up the Christians.
Pastors told me how that book transformed church life. Big publishers and editors told me how they were changed. One editor of a large publishing house told me he was changed by reading The Spiritual Man, because he was the editor of spooky books, and he himself became spooky. That book saved him.
That book really helped a lot, but of course it is a little difficult to read. The reason is that our brother Watchman Nee spoke this message while he was in Europe, and after he spoke, Dr. Kinnear edited it. So it is English English—London English—and a little difficult.
But thank God, before Brother Nee went to Europe, in 1936 he traveled in China and gave the same messages in different places. Those listeners were not so educated or sophisticated, so he tried to speak with many illustrations and more directly. It was much easier to understand.
So I feel that this book, The Secret of Christian Living, is actually easier to understand than The Normal Christian Life.
Now, when you are reading that book, you have this question:
I have heard and learned much knowledge of the truth, and oftentimes the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. We find ourselves always struggling and not able to live out what we learn. Have you had similar experience in your early days? Would you be able to share with us how the Lord brought you through?
Well, I thank God for such experience. If you have never had such an experience, I do not know where you are.
After we are saved, as I said this morning, we have a new life in us. This new life in us is what you say here: “The spirit is willing.” Unbelievers do not have this problem, but with believers, you begin to have this problem.
Your spirit is willing. As Paul says, “To will is present with me, but to do that which is good is not.” Why? Because of the flesh. So you have this experience of conflict between the spirit and the flesh, or between the spirit and the soul.
You have two lives within you. You have Christ in your spirit; you have self in your soul; and old Adam is stronger than young Christ. That is our experience.
How we struggle over this matter! Even the Apostle Paul struggled over it. I believe it is an experience we have to go through, because through that kind of experience we begin to enter into real knowledge.
The knowledge that we have accumulated from outside—biblical knowledge and truth—is objective knowledge. You know it, but instead of delivering you, it condemns you.
That is my experience. If I did not know, I felt better. But because I knew, I was condemned.
You remember in John, the Lord said that when the Holy Spirit came, you would be convicted concerning sin, because you do not believe in Me; and concerning righteousness, because I go to My Father. In other words, our Lord Jesus was able to go back to the Father, but we are not able to go there because we are not righteous. So it condemns us.
Thank God, that is the way the Lord tries to deliver us. We will go through such experiences until we come to a day, just like Paul:
O wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me out of the body of this death?
Not until that day will you be delivered. You will still be struggling because you are trying to overcome by your own strength.
It is the purpose of God to make you defeated. Thank God for defeat. If you are successful, you do not learn the lesson. But because you fail, you begin to learn the lesson and come to the same conclusion as God has concluded: there is no good in your flesh.
So try no more. What can you do? Immediately following, in Romans 7:25, it says, “Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord.” That is when the crisis really comes.
Now, in different Christians, the experiences are different. If you read The Secret of Christian Living, I believe Brother Nee shared his own experience. He was already serving the Lord, but he was struggling over this matter.
He was told Romans 6:6: “Our old man was crucified with Christ.” He was told from Romans 6:11 to reckon himself as dead. So he tried to reckon, reckon, reckon. The more he reckoned, the more alive he became.
He went through this struggle for some years, until one day, when he was reading the Scriptures, suddenly God gave him a revelation, a light. He saw that God had put him in Christ. So when Christ died, he died. That is a fact.
You remember how he ran down from his room and, in the kitchen, met his brother. He told his brother, “Do you know I died?”
When you read books like that, it seems so drastic. Probably you are hoping that you will have such a drastic experience. That is the trouble with reading biographies, because biographies always give you something drastic; otherwise, they are not interesting.
But when you come to the real facts, it is different. God deals with everyone differently. Why? Because we all have different temperaments.
I always say that not only is everyone’s physical feature different, but the shape of everyone’s soul is different. You look at the face: a small area, only five features, and God can arrange these five things in your face and make everyone different. Even twins are different. Wonderful!
When God gave us our soul, our soul also has a shape, and that shape is different in every person. The shape of our soul is what we call today temperament. You are born with a certain temperament.
Some people are born quick; some people are born slow. Some people are extroverts; some people are introverts. Everyone is different. When you look at how God deals with people, He deals with them according to their temperament.
With some people, their spiritual experience is drastic—a crisis, then another crisis. That is the way they grow. But other people gradually grow until one day, without their knowledge, they cross the Rubicon and are already in a different place. That is the way God even speaks.
As far as my little experience is concerned, according to my temperament, I grew into it very slowly. But then, one day, it seemed to become clear.
Now, that does not mean that you do not fail anymore. You continue to fail, but by the grace of God, the recovery is quicker. It does not mean that because you have crossed, as it were, the threshold, you are perfect. Not so.
No one can guarantee for life. You have to depend upon the Lord. He is the only One who is able to preserve.
You find in 1 Thessalonians 5:23-24:
And the God of peace Himself sanctify you wholly;
and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved entire,
without blame at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Faithful is He that calleth you,
who will also do it.
It is the performance of our Lord. Without the Lord Jesus, there is nothing you can do. So when you come to such an issue, thank God for such an issue, because that is the way God is working His work out in your life.
Keep on believing. Trust in Him more and more. You begin to realize that you cannot do anything, and you do not try anymore. Until one day—maybe with some people they know it, and maybe with other people they do not know it—but that is the way it is.
Do not be disappointed. I know a number of people who, reading biographies, always try to look for the same kind of experience. If they do not have it, they say that they do not have the reality. Not so. Trust Him. He knows how to deal with each and every one.
But the fact is this: you cannot deceive yourself. If you have it, you have it—not by your effort, but by God’s grace. If you do not have it, you cannot pretend that you have it. It does not work.
Now another question:
As a group, most of the time we are battling with our individual concerns, lacking the burden for the church and His kingdom. What will be the way for us as a group to reach there?
If you read the Scriptures, when do you really enter into body life? It is true that when you are saved, you know that you are not alone. When you meet another Christian, immediately you find there is a bond. You belong to one Body. You are members of one another.
But even though you have that body consciousness, it does not mean that you have come to the sense that you have to live a body life. You can still continue to live as an individual.
How do you come to the place where you begin to see that without the Body you cannot live?
I often remember the story told by Brother Nee. When he was in England, he went to visit George Cutting. You may have heard of George Cutting, because George Cutting wrote a pamphlet, Safety, Certainty, and Enjoyment.
Aside from the Bible, that pamphlet had one of the widest circulations. Many people, because of that little pamphlet, really understood what salvation is.
Brother Nee went there to see George Cutting. He was in his nineties at the time and sometimes in a coma. Brother Nee went there to visit him. He was sleeping in bed, so Brother Nee sat by the bed waiting for him to wake up.
When he woke up, he told Brother Nee, “I cannot do without Him, and He cannot do without me.” He was referring to God. He said, “I cannot do without Christ,” but he also said, “Christ cannot do without me.”
That was his understanding. Brother Nee wanted to change it. Not only is it that we cannot do without Him and He cannot do without me; he said we should come to the point where we see, “I cannot do without you, and you cannot do without me.” Now that is body life.
Now, when does that body life begin? Not until consecration. Consecration is the key to that.
If you read Romans 12, verse 1 says, “Present your bodies a living sacrifice.” It is plural: “your bodies.” Everyone has his or her own body.
The body here represents the whole being, because it is referring to conduct. When it refers to behavior and conduct, it is the body that expresses it. So it does not mean just the physical body; it means the whole being.
Each of us must present himself as a living sacrifice. When you do that, there is a transformation in your mind. Your mind will be renewed. Then, in Romans 12:5, you begin to see that you are a member in the Body. You are not alone.
Strictly speaking, we begin to see the Body—that is to say, we begin to see that without the Body we cannot live—after consecration. I cannot live without the Body, and the Body cannot live without me.
If you have read the book Serving in Spirit, Brother Nee gave some messages in 1949, and there is a chapter on consecration. We think consecration is once for all. Not so.
Consecration is a daily matter. It is like the burnt offering; it has to be continued day and night. You consecrate according to what you understand.
When we first consecrate ourselves to the Lord, we only consecrate to the extent of what we understand. It is not full consecration.
Then, after you consecrate, the Lord begins to work in your life. He begins to bring you into some crises, and through these crises He tests your consecration. You will find that your consecration is not perfect.
It is after such testing that your consecration begins to become real. After your consecration again becomes real, the Lord will continue to lead you on the way of consecration until you reach what Madame Guyon called absolute surrender.
So it is a process. But thank God, consecration really starts to open your eyes to see that you cannot live without the Body. That will be the first time you realize that you belong to the Body.
Otherwise, mentally you may know it, but spiritually you are still alone. We need to look to the Lord that He will really lead us in the way of consecration. More and more, you will begin to be burdened with the house of God instead of being burdened only with yourself and your immediate needs.
Now there is another question from The Secret of Christian Living, according to Luke 9:23:
If we want to follow the Lord, we must deny ourselves and take up our cross daily. What is considered our cross, since this is a daily exercise? How do we recognize our cross so that we do not miss the opportunity? Will we know it in our spirits, or is this something that we need to be mindful and watchful about?
God willing, I will speak more on that tomorrow. But I think it is clear why the Lord said, “If you want to follow Me, you have to deny yourself, take up your cross daily, and follow Me.”
It is because our soul life is the problem. It is because we want to save our soul life. As long as our soul life is saved, we will not be able to be transformed and conformed to the image of Christ. You can see how serious it is.
Who is your enemy? The world, Satan, or yourself? We do not realize that self is the biggest enemy to our spiritual life. It is the hardest thing to be saved from.
That is the reason why the Lord says, “You have to deny yourself.” This is something you have to go through; otherwise, you cannot follow the Lord, because that is the way the Lord lived while He was on earth.
Now, what is a cross? We do not choose our cross. We do not create our own cross for ourselves or for other people. It is the Holy Spirit who is in charge of that.
He knows us so well. He knows how to deal with our soul life—in what stage and in what area. He will arrange our crosses to bear.
It is when God’s will and your will cross each other—that is a cross. When your soul life and what God likes cross each other, that is your cross. What you love and what He loves cross each other: you have a cross.
Every day in our daily life, whether it is people, things, or events, we meet crosses. The reason is that God wants to deal with our self-life daily.
What is visible may be people who cross you, things that cross you, or an event or environment that crosses you. But actually, behind it, it is the spirit and the flesh, the spirit and the soul, God and yourself. That is the cross the Holy Spirit arranges.
When the cross comes, if you deny yourself, you are able to bear it. If you do not deny yourself, you can escape it. But if you escape it, your self-life, your soul, is saved. That is quite unique here.
Do we know it in our spirit? Yes. It is not something you only try to figure out. In your spirit, you know what it is.
Oftentimes, when such a thing happens, you try to reason yourself out of it: “It is not fair,” or, “God has His own reason.” On the one hand, you need to watch and pray lest you fall into temptation; that is true.
But on the other hand, it is not something you only realize because you are watching for it. Even if you are not watching for it, in your spirit you know. It is something inward; it goes on within your spirit.
If your spirit is active and normally exercised, you know you have a cross. But if your spirit is dull, the Holy Spirit may arrange a cross, yet you do not realize it. If you do not realize it, you do not take it.
So it all depends on the condition of your spirit. Do not think that because today you have no cross, you should be happy about it. Maybe your spirit is not alert.
But do not try to create crosses. Madame Guyon—many people admire her very much—loved the cross and even tried to create crosses. But that is overdoing it.
Just put yourself in the hand of God. He has the wisdom to know how to deal with you and how much you can bear at a certain time. He knows it.
If the cross comes, be sure that He has already given you enough strength to bear it, because He measures it with what He has already deposited in your life. Thank God for that. It is wonderful.
The last question asks: “When a Christian faces a crisis or trial, is it normal that he can be joyful and sorrowful at the same time? Why can one feel like that?” Now, that is true.
When you are in a crisis, when a cross crosses your way, you have mixed feelings. So far as your soul is concerned, it is sorrow; so far as your spirit is concerned, if you obey, there is joy.
Even our Lord Jesus, you remember, when He went into the Garden of Gethsemane, said, “My soul is sorrowful, even unto death.” Why? Because that sinless soul was to become sin, and He had to taste death. He was sorrowful unto death.
But in His spirit, He said, “Not My will, but Thine, be done.” So you do find that when you are going through a crisis like that, this is your experience.
Going back to the former question: “How can we experience the fullness of Christ if we do not know Christ well? How can we know Christ better and clearer in practical ways?”
The fullness of Christ is always something beyond us. To put it another way, who can fathom the fullness of Christ? The fullness of Christ is the fullness of God.
No one person can apprehend all the fullness of Christ. It takes the whole Body to apprehend it. That is what you find in the second prayer of Paul in the letter to the Ephesians.
Ephesians 3 contains the second prayer of Paul. The first prayer is for revelation: that God will give us the spirit of wisdom and revelation to know Him. The second prayer is for apprehension—not only that He reveals, but that you apprehend it and possess it.
How do you possess it? In Ephesians 3:16, Paul prays:
That He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory,
that ye may be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inward man.
In other words, you will not be able to experience Christ and His fullness until your spirit becomes strong. How can our spirit become strong enough to overcome ourselves? We need the strengthening of the Holy Spirit in the inner man. The inner man is the spirit.
When the Holy Spirit empowers our spirit and makes it strong, what happens? “That Christ may dwell through faith in your hearts.” The heart here is the soul.
The heart is the pathway between the spirit and the soul. The heart includes the three functions of the soul plus one function in the spirit: conscience.
Because your spirit is strong, the life of the Spirit—Christ—begins to invade into the soul and drives out, as it were, the self, which is the life of the soul. When this happens, you begin to experience Christ.
Then you begin to apprehend the fullness of Christ with the whole Body. That is the way you come into the experience of His fullness.
Briefly, does that help you a little bit? If not, look to the Lord, because He alone can save us to that end.